I still need love: a "Stay with Me" review
I remember finding Ayobami Adebayo's debut on the new shelf at my hometown library. The bright orange and pink cover grabbed my attention, as did the synopsis. The tale of a woman furious with her husband for acquiring a second wife amidst societal pressures and desperate to have a baby to remain a worthy woman in the eyes of her and her husband's families? It sounded like a lethal and intriguing premise.
It turned out to be quite the gripping read as well. Although it did have a slow start, Stay with Me remained fascinating throughout its short run. Navigating a timeline jumping between 2008 and the 1980's, Adebayo navigates a country plagued by political turmoil and strict gender expectations. Yejide's desperation to be seen as valuable, alongside her husband Akin's frustrations with the circumstances he's in and how to preserve his marriage, is tense and electrifying. We get to know these two narrators intimately, and yet they betray the reader in shocking ways. Slow pacing and tragically funny humor give way to frenetic childbirth, raising, and subsequent disaster as the book traverses through the years. Regret piles up until it gives way, but, surprisingly, there's hope at the end of the tunnel.
In 2008, Yejide leaves Jos for an important event back home amidst a move, unanswered questions from her husband tugging her out of bed. In 1985, Yejide arrives at her Ilesian home to discover familial relatives have come to visit with some news: Akin has another wife. Prior to this, Akin and Yejide agreed their marriage wouldn't be polygamous. However, their failure to conceive children after four years has made relatives impatient. Enter Funmi, a woman Yejide immediately distrusts. After feeding Funmi and the family members old beans, Akin and Yejide argue, Yejide furious at her husband for going through with this plan and Akin saying he had no choice. Regardless, Yejide vows to become pregnant. At her salon, she overheard a story once about a religious brotherhood up on a mountain that blessed women with pregnancy. Yejide follows through with this, developing pregnancy symptoms that, unbeknownst to her, don't mean she's pregnant, despite her insistence and Akin's doubt and suspicion. Yejide just wants to give birth to finally shut up her relatives. Yet this one act sets a whole train of events into motion, one that leads to a secret plan, an affair, death, and the reveal of a shocking secret. Will Akin and Yejide's marriage survive, or is it destined to crumble apart?
I was surprised by the first person dual point of view of this novel, especially because it wasn't explicitly addressed in the blurb and isn't differentiated within the text. However, it's really effective at capturing both sides of Akin and Yejide's marriage, particularly with the twists and turns their story takes. Their version of their marriage they paint at the beginning isn't the whole truth, from their first meeting on different dates to the reason why Yejide wasn't able to get pregnant. Adebayo does a phenomenal job at keeping the reader on their toes, particularly during the second half, once Yejide gives birth to a child, inner motivations get revealed, and the drama really gets going. While the first half of the novel is more focused on slice-of-life aspects (Yejide's work as a hairdresser, for example), Adebayo makes up for it when she starts revealing hidden secrets. It allows the dark humor to fall away and really embrace the fear lying beneath the surface on what's going to happen to this tumultuous marriage as death, infidelity, and uncertainty strike.
Adebayo's characters are intriguing in their own right as well, helped by writing full of character voice. Yejide in particular is fascinating, especially as her folktale equivalent attempt at getting pregnant becomes real in her eyes, desperate to actually give birth to a child so Akin's family can stop breathing down her neck and Funmi won't get her wish of becoming Main Wife. She also doesn't understand why Akin would even want a second wife when their relationship has been stable. Now it's falling apart, and exasperation and supposed betrayal lead to dastardly consequences. However, those consequences may have been planted by Akin, although not to the extent he was wishing. I really appreciate that Adebayo took the time to reveal Akin's own frustration at his circumstances, those immediate with Funmi latching herself onto him and those more secretive, not immediate to the reader. The cast is also wrought with angst from attempted governmental coups in Nigeria, putting the whole country on edge. It adds further tension among the conversations between Yejide and her friends/coworkers, Akin and his brother, and even among the very notions this book wrestles with. The idea of being a perfect mother, the best parent possible, is still present amidst the weight of a country one step away from crumbling. It would be enough to put anyone on edge, but amidst this couple's hopes and fears, it becomes magnified.
Although the first half of the novel spent too much time on the day-to-day action for my liking, Ayobami Adebayo's debut novel is a great portrait of a marriage straining beneath the weight of expectations, how people react to that stress, and what happens when everything falls to pieces and comes back together again. Although it's been a minute since I've read Stay with Me, it has definitely stuck with me. I recommend this book for those looking for a sharp slice of Black literary fiction.
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